100 days of lockdown.

100 days of lockdown.

Can you believe it. It’s been one hundred days since lockdown began. Whilst things are slowly being eased it’s still so surreal to accept that lockdown even happened in the first place. At the time it was announced as a time line of only three weeks and the world would go back to normal. We believed the earth would keep turning and normality would return. But the days grew to weeks and the weeks grew to months and here we are 100 days later.

In someways I’m thankful for the lockdown. I’m thankful it’s protected my family and friends and it has protected many lives. I’m thankfull the world has slowed down a bit. I’m thankfull for taking the time to appreciate the worlds beauty once more and learning what is truely important in the world. I’ve become thankfull for my old and new life in many ways. I’m thankful that I am able to appreciate how lovely my life was before. How loved I was and didn’t see. I am able to see how much I love my family and friends and how lonely I feel without them. I’m thankful for knowing now that the experiences of going shopping trips and eating out are a treat and something I never will take for advantage again. I will always now have more respect for my fellow human beings and a sense of community I never had before.

We as humans will never be the same. Whilst things will open again next week and normality creeps in again there will always be the anxiety of the what ifs. What if I catch covid? What if the businesses shut down from loss of earnings? What if we are placed on a second lock down? Although I highly doubt another nationwide lockdown will be impossed I know that the anxiety will long linger for many months and years to come.

Obviously lockdown has been hard with every postive there’s a negative. Being stuck in with your own thoughts all day and no physical contact in many cases can be hard. I don’t think I’ve wanted to cuddle my friends as much as I do now and I’ve never been one for personal contact. My mental health has been on a rollercoaster. I’m not afraid to admit there was times I didn’t want to go on anymore. Where getting up in the morning was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But you know what I got through it. I’ve spoken to so many others who have experienced the same emotions so know that your not alone. It’s okay to feel lonely, it’s okay to feel anything other then positive right now. You don’t have to do something with your life like develop a new hobby all you need to do right now is survive and that’s way more commendable then learning the guitar or some other pointless hobby someone has got.

While there is still no end in sight but lockdown restrictions are lifting it is okay to feel scared. It’s okay to question everything. It’s okay to be scared of meeting friends and family. It’s okay to worry about going shopping. It’s okay to be afraid. It’s okay to have relapse of health anxiety and panic every time you go out. It’s okay to be concerned. So do what’s best for you and take your time. Do not feel you need to rush into things just as restrictive measures are taken away and someone tells you what you should be doing. Ease yourself back in slowly. If you want to wear a mask, wear one. Let’s try not to focus on what others are doing as it only gets us more upset and everyone knows the risks. Let’s try focus on just us and what’s right for us.

So here’s to 100 days. I can not believe it has been that long and it blows my mind even typing it. But we will come out the other side. We have survived and we will continue to survive. One day we will feel normality once again.

Do you journal?

Do you journal?

So before lockdown I started a journal. I’ve been told for years I should start one by many healthcare professionals after battling with my mental health. But I’ve always felt this sounds stupid and why should I do it? Nobody will ever read it so it’s a waste of complete time.

But after a paperchase sale near me a cute journal caught my eye and i couldn’t put it down. Sure I do the five minuite journal and self help journals but have I ever just unleashed myself in full? Let out my emotions I feel without saying the words and fearing judgement? No.

As a child I had one of those super cool diary’s you know the ones that had a electric lock and key and when you opened it there was a light and everything. Very swanky and perhaps the best Christmas present of my youth. Of course I wrote about pointless crap like how my day has been and how I hated my parents over something stupid like not letting me stay up late to watch ima celeb. But as I got older the beautiful book went and I was never to capture my love for writing again.

So coming back to it. At the start of lockdown I had nothing to do and I meant nothing. So I pulled out the beautiful bargain and started writing. At first I started documenting lockdown in some sort of justication that one day my diary may be read. Then I realised no this is private and I can go into my feelings. My real feelings. I wrote down things that upset me. Things people did that upset me. I wrote about my feelings and why I felt like that and shortly I’d written pages apon pages and didn’t realise. A small weight was lifted at the acknowledgment that I basically had somewhere to express and leave my darker emotions. There’s a reason why the mean girls called it a burn book I guess.

I kept my journal a place to write my emotions and my troubles. To express myself without a fear of judgement. I couldn’t judge myself as I will never read it again. I may even burn it when I’m done as therapy. But the release I felt. Obviously I wrote positives too but I have a lot of positivity journals I kind of keep this one as the feelings book and try not to feel I have to build myself up and I know it’s okay.

So you know what? I journal and I don’t care. Buy a pretty ass cactus covered or whatever you like journal and sit down for a bit and spill your feelings. Don’t read it again. Don’t hold back. Ask other members of your house not to read it or hide if you feel the need. But my god when they say it’s therapeutic they mean it.

Thanks for reading, Charlie x

Mud&Bloom Box. The perfect monthly activity box for little green fingers.

Mud&Bloom Box. The perfect monthly activity box for little green fingers.

Disclaimer: We where gifted this box in exchange for a review.

We recently have started gardening a little bit more now that it’s the summer and plants are growing a bit quicker. So when mud & bloom contacted us and wanted to send a box to review we where eager to try something new.

I think learning about how things grow and teaching your child the responsibility of looking after their plant is such a important life lesson. Elijah loves getting involved with crafts but then no longer wants to help. So this has been good to teach him things don’t last five minutes and we have to keep working hard to see anything grow.

So what we got inside: we got some seed packets, activity sheets, lolly pop sticks to label plants and we got some stickers for making elderflower cordial. We also got the dirt to grow the plants. They also kindly sent some chalk to draw outdoors.

Elijah enjoyed putting the dirt in the water to expand and then helping to plant and cover the seeds. Every day we got to water his plants and we’ve moved them to bigger pots. Soon we will be putting them into the ground. Elijah loves commenting on how big they are everyday too as we have breakfast looking at them!

Elijah has liked the responsibility and learning about looking after things and being gentle. I’m so thankful we got this box as it’s really shown me just how into gardening toddlers can be and it’ll be something we stick too! It’s given me more incentive to get him to help more in the garden too!

If your interested in subscribing to their boxes check out – http://www.mudandbloom.com

Thanks for reading, Charlie x

It’s okay to feel fine one day then bad the next.

It’s okay to feel fine one day then bad the next.

One thing I’ve noticed about talking about depression is the stigma that if your depressed that means you have to be depressed 24/7. You can’t have days where you smile because clearly that would mean your faking your depression and that you’re clearly an attention seeker. This is not true.

Yes many people are in a constant loop of depression where there is no escape but some of us have days we feel okay and then crash down to the pits of depression a hour later. We can be fine all day. We can be smiling, laughing, making jokes and seem really confident. A few hours later something clicks and we can’t even move our muscles to form a smile because that’s too difficult.

We are human. Those without depression experience more than one emotion. They experience happiness, brief sadness and anxiety then they go back to happiness. So why is the stigma still there someone with depression cannot have a good day. When you put that stigma on someone it makes them think they have to fake being happy 24/7 or the opposite. The opposite is feel like they aren’t allowed to be happy. I’ve experienced this. I’ve had people make comments when I’ve had days I feel a bit better and have somewhat been told my depressions gone then! no. If my depression was gone believe me I’d be shouting from the roof tops about it.

This also works for if you have time of work with depression. A few years ago I took a few weeks of work when I worked in care because I was depressed and being bullied. When I came back to work I was treated as if I’d faked my depression as I’d came back and was even accused of not being depressed anymore because I had to pretend to be happy around my clients who picked up on negative emotions. I felt like I wasn’t entitled to smile. I wasn’t entitled to be anything other then a sad emotional mess.

People seem to get annoyed whatever you do with regards to depression. People moan when your depressed, they moan your boring or anti social, or an attention seeker. They moan if your happy. There will never be a pleasing everyone.

But know this. If you suffer depression. It is not what defines you. If you have a few days in bed down in the dumps that is okay. It is also okay to smile again. It’s okay to be happy too. You’re not an attention seeker because your chemicals in your brain have allowed you to feel positive today. You should not worry about others opinions. Why? because the only persons who’s opinions matter is your own. Because other people are not educated enough. Because until someone experiences a patch of depression themselves they will never understand what it is like to be judged for every emotion they feel!

If your reading this as someone who doesn’t have depression. Remember that they are suffering even behind the smiles. Always try to bring them up not down. Be the hand to hold, the phone all at the end of a bad day. Be a friend. Remember storms always have bright periods before the darkness creeps back for another storm.

Always here in my emails and dms, Charlie x

Why you should be trying to use soaps more.

Why you should be trying to use soaps more.

I love using all sorts of products but I am up for trying anything new. I’ve been trying to use more soaps instead of shower gels. I have to say I’ve not always been a fan of soaps I’ve found they’re really drying but I’ve noticed since trying small business homemade products I haven’t had any irritation. I try not to use if I have a flare just incase but they have really been quite nice.

Obviously shower gels contain a lot of plastic and drying products that can irritate our skin. Also the wastage is not fab for the planet so I’ve been trying to use soap more to not only improve my skincare but also my carbon footprint.

I was kindly gifted some products from Ètre toi. These soaps have been really great for all the family to use. We where sent a zesty orange one and a grapefruit and Himalayan salt one.

Elijah likes sniffing the orange one and washing his hands with it and has had no irritation. The thing I like about these is they really foam up and go a long way. I love the freshness of the orange one which I can’t stop sniffing as it smells just like a freshly peeled orange.

The Himalayan salts in the grapefruit soap work well with the smell to give a slight exfoliation at the same time. Himalayan salts have many beauty and health benefits and are something I love to use in my baths so I’ve been using this in the bath alongside the salts I have.

There are many reasons why you should use soaps more. But one is the impact on the planet! if your interested in buying this product then check out their small business and give them some love and likes on their insta!

Insta-https://instagram.com/etretoi_

Shop-https://etretoi.bigcartel.com/

For all enquiries and collabs send me a message. Thanks for reading. Charlie x

Into the green candle review. As seen in vogue magazine!

Into the green candle review. As seen in vogue magazine!

It’s always exciting working with a new company and as you are very aware by now I am the candle connoisseur. I’m addicted to candles and there is something about lighting a candle at the end of the day that screams I’m done and ready to relax. I also have a strong belief that you’re not done cleaning till you’ve lit a wax melt at the end of it and all the smells in the room just wait through the house and make you feel cosy and clean again.

I was very fortunate to be offered some candles in exchange for this review. So they where kindly gifted. They have recently been featured in vogue magazine and that made me all the more excited. I used to always buy things I saw in magazines as of course they have teams that research these products meticulously. So to be highlighted in such a big magazine screams brilliant product.

First of all the items are beautiful. The packaging and the product style is simple and chic. They’re small so no massive candles floating around and can easily store away if you don’t like them on show you can out away with the screw lid.

Breathe and Be is my fav. It smells like mint which I love when I’m feeling unwell and stressed out as it’s a clearing revitalising smell. It smells so fresh and clear and you can feel your lungs opening when you sniff it. The wax burns really well and you can smell after around a minuite really strong. It is so fresh and feels like it’s opening you up as you breathe in! This is the newest candle and I adore it!

I was also sent kissed by the moon which is another fantastic smell. I think it smells like a relaxing night time candle. It smells calming and makes me feel at ease. My anxiety feels like it’s a bit more calm when I’m relaxed so hats of to this candle! It smells almost floraly but earthy at the same time.

These candles would also make the perfect gift for any candle lover aswell. if you would like to try use the discount BreatheandBe for 10 percent off.

Please do go and support this small buisness. A follow, a like, a comment, a share or purchase will make them do happy dance!

Follow their Instagram here – https://instagram.com/intothegreen_handcraft

And shop here- https://www.intothegreenhandcraft.co.uk/

As always thanks for reading and for all collabs drop me a email! Charlie x

10 reasons why you should have a child.

10 reasons why you should have a child.

The other day I did a ten things you should know before having a child and today I wanted to do from the opposite side. The good bits. Every negative has a positive and here are ours.

One. The love. You will never feel anything like it. You will never love as fiercely and you would die for something other than yourself. You feel and run off nothing but love in the newborn stage. The toddler stages may be hard but when they cuddle you or say I love you it makes your heart melt. Even the hardest of souls are melted like me!

Two. They’re funny. Elijah thinks he’s a comedian. The silly things he does to make us laugh. The funny faces, the farts. Everything about them will make you laugh at some point. They’re just a ball of laughter and silliness.

Three. When you see they’ve learnt something from you. You feel proud of both yourself and them. You get so excited over the littlest things like rolling over or learning to count. Soon everything they do is interesting because you made that and it’s incredible watching someone learn absolutely everything.

Four. No judgement of watching kids tv and Films. Nobody can judge if your still watching a kids cartoon when they’ve left the room or for buying toys that are clearly more for you then them. Fairly sure I buy toys because I want them not him!

Five. You get to relive your youth again. You get to pretend to be animals, run around being aeroplanes and being silly. You remember things you loved as a kid and try to share that with your child. Creating memories while reliving your youth is pretty cool.

Six. You get to be crafty. You get to make arts and crafts and create play. You get your creative side out. You’ll be amazed at just how many ideas pop into your head. Even if your art looks like your two year at least you can blame it on them and class as their hard work.

Seven. Seeing your parents with their grandchild. It’s lovely watching your kid loving and being loved by grandparents. It’s nice seeing how different they are and the happiness they bring. It’s nice to see your parents have a playful side you don’t remember after the teenage stage.

Eight. Happiness. Your child will bring you happiness. When they smile at you, talk to you, do something new or just talking to you. Sometimes you just have to look at them and your happy. If you’ve had a terrible day a cuddle fixes everything.

Nine. Enjoying being a parent. Being proud to talk about them, being proud to be their parent. Enjoying that this is your life now. Although there are days you want to rip your hair out there are some rare days where you feel really great and like your killing this parent game! Days when you feel achievement because you survived another day and your kid did too!

Ten. Seeing a loved one with their child. Nothing will ever describe that fullness I get in my heart when Elijah and James play together or do something together. When they smile and cuddle. When I first saw James hold Elijah I think my heart wanted to explode out my chest I was so full. This love is like nothing I could ever explain.

As always thanks for reading, Charlie x

Revamping our room with photo wall

Revamping our room with photo wall

So the lovely people at photo wall got in touch and offered to send us some gifted wall paper to review. as we’d been planning to redecorate our room since we first moved in we jumped at the chance.

We immediately looked at what they had and had to make the hard decision on what to choose. There was so many beautiful prints and styles and I was so close to ordering a animal mural for Elijah but you know what I deserve nice things too! Ordering was super easy and we out the measurements in. Within a few days it arrived.

It arrived with instructions, paste and the wallpaper. You could tell the quality just from opening it. We went for the top range so no reflection at day time as our bedroom is very light.

Before. White, Chipped, dirty looking.

Now the wallpaper had arrived we contacted someone to come do our wallpaper the following weekend as covid guidelines allow it now and we got to work. Our bedroom was a state. The previous owners had rushed about and made a mess. Gouges in walls, dodgy filling, a whole in the wall and paint here there and everywhere. It took us four nights to paint the walls, ceilings and fill holes. We took of the clothing rails and filled and painted them too. We glossed everything we could and even touched up the door and window sills. I painted the inside of the fire box and it looked so much better.

Then came the wallpaper day! The guy came as we didn’t trust our selfs and got to work. He said it was super easy as it was clearly labelled and informed him wear to cut. He was able to line and match up the wallpaper easy. He said it was easy then the other wall paper we got for the chimney breast. When he was done we where amazed at how it looked.

After as it started to dry on wall!

Immediately it became the smartest room in the house. It was like our very own art work. Something different to any one we know. The flowers and birds are beautiful and like nothing I have ever seen before. I enjoy looking at it and thinking wow this is our room! I love birds and cherry blossoms so I’m so glad I picked this. It goes with bedding and my bedroom already so no need to change the room over either which is always a plus!

The only downside was we over measured and had to cut the birds tales of because of the door way and the fact we run out of space but I’m super glad the faces of the birds look like they’re peaking in and they’re all there.

I’m so thankfull and my house feels a bit more like a home. It’s my personality, my happy place my safe space!

Massive Thank-you to photo wall for gifting is this beautiful wallpaper. I will cherish it forever!

Go check them out here- https://www.photowall.co.uk

Also check their Instagram here- https://instagram.com/photowall_sweden?igshid=xh7cw7o04lxc

You can get 25%off with code – hazelwoods2020

Thanks for reading, Charlie x

The perfect Father’s Day gift

The perfect Father’s Day gift

The people over at hooray heroes kindly gifted me a book for Father’s Day to show my followers and readers what I think about it. I’ve been eyeing up their books after seeing many ads so I was very excited to be gifted one!

So first of all you choose the book you want. Then you design your characters. This is the fun part! You can choose hair style, colour, freckles, skin tone, eye colour and more! You can put your names in as well so it makes it super personal to you. It’s really nice knowing that something your helping to create will be in a book. Especially if you have a hard to find name in a gift store this is the perfect personalised gift for you.

I love that you can also choose what stories go inside you can preview and select up to ten mini stories to go in the book too.

Once you’ve ordered it only takes a few days to come I think I waited five days and I was alerted when each step of the creation process was completed and a time my parcel would be delivered.

When it arrived it was in a nice cellophane wrapping to preven damage. The book is hardback and the quality is amazing. Each page is full of colour and keeps your child’s attention. This was a gift to the whole family really which was nice because we all get to share it.

It’s something that will last for years and we love all the stories, you can read as little or as much as you like!

We will defo keep them in mind for our next personalised book adventure!

With Father’s Day coming up now is the perfect time to get idea and this is the perfect book for lots of family’s!

You can shop here! https://hoorayheroes.co.uk/personalised-books/fathers-day

As always thanks for reading Charlie!

Medications / topical creams that help my rosacea flares.

Medications / topical creams that help my rosacea flares.

When I am stressed I have a flare. I get spots, my face goes redder them a baboons backside and my face burns. It burns so much I want to scratch it off. I have at times if my life even contemplated suicide because it has hurt that much. So I am very, very lucky my dermatologist found the creams that work with me. I use it every now and then when I have a flare. As LOTS of you have been emailing and messaging me on Instagram about what I use I thought I’ll just do a little post on it here.

Obviously these are not over the counter medications but you could request your doctor try’s you on them. You can however buy a low dose of azaliac acid by the ordinary and that’s quite good too. Not as strong but it is good. So without further rambling here’s some products I use and have helped me.

First up. Soolantra aka Ivermectin. This cream is prescribed and is hardcore stuff. With rosacea you are more prone to being exposed to sunlight, food, cold, stress, skin notes and lots more. This cream is prescribed to help stop the inflammation caused by rosacea. It helps treat and heal skin lesions and helps reduce the spots that come with it. It also cures facial mites and scabies. This is basically like a anti inflammatory magic cure for your face. When I first took it I had a swollen nose that wouldn’t go and a face littered with spots after 6 weeks I was cleared up. It then returned with spots and wide spread redness but my nose has never looked anything near as bad as it was. When you have a flare they suggest using a few times a week for 6 weeks as it’s strong stuff. This is my wonder cure. It stops the burning. I feel like me again.

Next we have skinoren- azeliac acid. This can be used alongside. This kills bacteria and helps acne. You can buy a low dosage version as I stated above. As my rosacea causes acne it helps with my confidence of not only redness but full on adult acne at the same time. This stuff really does work and again you use a few times a week for a few weeks then have a break then use with a flare.

You should only use these medicines as and when. Why? Because your skin needs to heal and work our what time do with itself. You also want breaks between medicines and for your skin not to get used to the medication.

These medications worked for me and I hope if your doctor can be persuaded to let you try that they may work for you.

I’m back on them again now so will show a before and after. If you are using this it is important to have a full skincare session.

I cleanse, exfoliate and tone regularly. I also apply moisturising serums twice daily and also apply a thick night cream because these medicines will dry your skin out. Make sure to wash your face twice a day and treat your skin like it deserves.

Also ALWAYS where high spf sunscreen. I don’t care if it’s snowing outside your skin will burn and you need to protect yourself from the uv damage to your skin.

Good luck, any questions send me a message! Charlie x