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I’m really enjoying Elijah being two. I’m enjoying spending time together a lot more as he tells me everything he wants and talks to me now. He asks me to play with him and expresses himself so much more. He is still having tantrums galore but they’re shorter and he understands a bit better when I explain no means no. Although I’m not looking forward to more tantrums I’m still looking forward to watching Elijah continue to blossom into the happy, smart boy he already is! It’s so much more exciting when your kids can talk to you and when they say I love you there’s nothing better.
Nothing can beat a autumn morning walk 🍁🍂
Happy 2nd birradiated to the happiest boy ❤️
Today’s blog post is all about what I do to calm down. Have you been keeping up with my daily blog posts? To read the latest copy the short link or check my bio!
Today’s read for our animal obsessed boy, it’s been raining so much today so we’ve stayed in and read and napped. We’ve both got this horrid cold that’s been going round and sticking to your chest so I’ve been utilising his nap time and napping too. People never tell you how hard being a parent is when both you and your child are ill it is so draining! Currently whacking the heating on and watching hey duggee under blankets!
We’ve spent our evening making Christmas cards. I know it’s early but considering i take like a month to remember to deliver any sort of card it’s probably right on time😂

We always knew we wanted a child together and when we decided to try we where both quite excited. We did all the normal things people do when trying to get pregnant. Stopped my pill, worked out and lost weight. Ate healthy and took some fertility helping pills. Tracked when to try and tried all we could.

But did I enjoy trying? In some respects yes. It was exciting knowing we were trying to make a child together which was part of both of us and something we both wanted. I was excited to get fat and grow something inside of me. I enjoyed knowing aswell it was a decision and if I was to be pregnant it wouldn’t be a accident and something we’d panic over it was something we would be excited over.

I didn’t like the failure that can come with trying. I think a part of me expected to get pregnant immediately. I didn’t like taking pregnancy tests and them being negatives. It made me worry there was something wrong with me and made me sad. I would remember talking about how if I felt sick or tired that maybe I was tired and we’d both smile and say must be pregnant and I’d take another test and it would say I wasn’t. I didn’t like hoping I was pregnant and somewhat thinking I was because I’d hope so much at times to then have to see the not pregnant on the stick or a period.

When I fell pregnant I was quite lucky as we’d only tried a little while. I remember I peed on a stick and I could see the faintest line. James told me he couldn’t see it but I could I just knew i was pregnant I felt different I myself in ways I can’t describe. I went to the shops and brought a clear blue digital test which I did later and it said not pregnant. I was heart broken but meant I could still go out drinking for my works do.I had two drinks and remembered thinking no I think I might be pregnant and stoped and felt horrid. Something in me just new and luckily I’d barely drunk. 2 days later I was due and no period. I took a test with my first pee of the day and a slightly faint line again. I called my mum as she was a midwife and she came with more pregnancy tests and we did 3 more. Within seconds they all came up clear as day. I was pregnant. And I had known all along. I was In shock and so was James as we’d convinced myself I wasn’t pregnant. March the 11th 2017 was the best day of my life when I knew I was pregnant.

This was how thin the original line was which I thought meant I was pregnant. I was correct!

I loved trying because we where in control and we knew early on. I didn’t like trying because of the negatives and the unreliability of some pregnancy tests at times. I didn’t like being hopeful and let down all the time but I adored when we where finally successful. My hats go off to people who try for years and sometimes need ivf. It must be such a horrible thing aswell when people are told they are infertile and require intervention or adoption if they are to have children. My heart goes to all your mummies that aren’t mummy’s yet trying your best.

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